Kindness: Neighbors

One of my good friends turned thirty recently, joining me in the next decade of our lives. She told me a great story when we went out for drinks a few nights later.

On the eve of her birthday, Friend had been hanging out with some buddies and got home late that night. Upon returning to her building, she found something unexpected. Nestled in her doorway was a beautiful bouquet of flowers and a card. Hm, wonder who stopped by, she thought. Not to mention, how'd they get into the building? Pleasantly puzzled, she let herself into her apartment and opened the card: Some special people make the world brighter just by being in it...happy 30th birthday!, it read. Signed: James & Deborah "your Boston parents"

A-MAZ-ING.

Flash back to a few months before - some new neighbors had moved into Friend's building. She ran into the couple in the hall and they chatted for a while. They were about her parent's age and had recently decided to move into the city, selling their house in the country now that their kids were grown and gone. Friend mentioned, just briefly in passing, that her birthday was coming up soon, September 1st to be exact.

A-MAZ-ING. Just a tiny comment during a brief conversation. Just something mentioned and moved past. But they remembered. They remembered Friend's special day. And made her special day in the process. A random act of kindness, neighbor to neighbor.

Kindness: Supplies

I can't believe it's basically the end of the summer. I mean, technically August is summer, but September is right around the corner. And while kids up here in New England haven't boarded a big yellow bus to start the 2010-2011 school year, kids down south have. Shocking.

Yesterday, Husband and I decided to donate to some schools. I had just read an article about a website that you could do that through. I had donated that way in the past and thought it was really neat, but couldn't remember the site I used (I've since remembered). You can go on to the site(s) and look up classrooms by school name, city, state, teacher, etc. You can also find out school stats including their poverty / free lunch levels. You can read all about the projects teachers are trying to fund or see a list of materials that they need.

I spent a year working in a school as an assistant second grade teacher. It was a nice, fairly well funded school, but all the teachers were still in need of things; letters constantly went home to parents about classroom needs - tissues, hand sanitizer, a new pencil sharpener. Now, working at a company, I can literally just walk upstairs, browse the supply room and grab all the pens and paperclips I need. In schools, there's no such thing. Teachers have to provide almost all their supplies themselves. This is particularly hard for first-year teachers, as teachers build up their supplies over the years. First-year teachers are starting from a blank slate, an empty classroom with empty pockets, having just graduated from school.

Think about your first days of school: how exciting it was to walk into a new classroom, how exciting it was to see all the books and the cushy beanbag chairs in the reading nook, how exciting it was going to be doing new projects. Now imagine a classroom with paltry bulletin board decorations, with just a few books on a shelf in the corner, without the opportunity to watch butterflies grow from cocoons, to see how tangrams can make all sorts of animals, to use cuisinaire rods to learn math skills. Sad isn't it?

So take a minute and a few dollars and donate. Since it's almost fall. Since teacher assignments are coming in the mail. Since school buses are getting shined up and tuned up and prepped for service. Since some kids are buying new backpacks and lunchboxes, while others' moms are sewing up holes in last year's.

Here are some sites. I'm sure there are other resources in your local area, too.

Donors Choose
I donated here in the past

I Love Schools
Here are the classrooms we donated to this year - 1 in each state we grew up in, and 1 where we now live. Donate with us or search the site for one that interests you.
Dorchester, MA
Chapel Hill, NC
Andalusia, AL

Kindness: Large Luggage

Yesterday, when on my epic commute into work, I ran across a kindness.

Husband and I were making our way from the Red line to the Orange line of the subway which involved some substantial stairs. While rushing down the right side of the staircase, someone was lugging a suitcase up the left side. In fact, she was helping another woman carry the giant piece of luggage.

Well, that was a kindness right there – a stranger helping a tourist (or I guess she could be a resident) carry her bags up the stairs. But what made it even nicer was the fact that the helper wasn’t even going the same direction as the woman in need. Because a few minutes later, she showed up on our platform, where we were waiting for our next train. So she must have been on her way somewhere, gotten to the bottom of the stairs en route to our platform, see the woman struggling and decided to help out by going back up the stairs with the suitcase. Even though it was out of her way.

Which is exactly what makes a great kindness – going out of your way to help someone.

Kindness: Manual Labor

This one isn't quite as "unseen" as previous kindnesses, but it deserves some attention none-the-less.

Next week, Husband and I are moving into a new place. We're totally excited about it - more space, cute neighborhood, seemingly awesome landlord. Another tally mark in the 'pro' column is that we're allowed to paint the place. And that's something that can really make a rental feel more like a home. It's currently painted, but more earthy, country than our taste. So we've decided to paint pretty much the whole thing. And we've gathered some troops to help us do it.

When we first started talking about the massive undertaking, I told Husband that we needed to have a painting party and get some friends to come and help. He was skeptical about that, presumably thinking no one would really want to come do that. But he was wrong. In fact, I'd say 80% of invitees are showing up or providing painting supplies.

Now, there are some reasons people may have stepped up:

1. They heart painting. No, seriously, some people do. One friend said she'd help us pack because she loves packing but is not much of a painter. She won't be there, but there are others who adamantly profess their love of painting.
   
2. They love free food and drinks. Really though, that's a lot of work for a few slices of pizza and a Coke. Or beer.
3. They like getting together with friends. More likely. Some people will be meeting new people and some people will be catching up with oldies but goodies.
   
4. They just wanna help a neighbor out. It warms my heart to envision us all in our empty place, working together to accomplish a goal (or 8 goals, as rooms go).

So, those are some of the motivations I'd guess are behind the massive volunteerism - 15 painters + 4 supply donors! Because, when it comes down to it, it's just manual labor. Sweating and getting paint all over yourself. And that's why it's an extra-special kindness. Kindness in an outpouring of friendly love. From the goodness of their hearts. Thanks in advance friends!

Kindness: Translation

The other day when I was taking the T (subway) home, there was a slight commotion on the train.

I was sitting there, zoned-out as usual and engrossed in whatever book I was reading at the time (maybe Alice in Wonderland?) when a woman stepped to the center of the car and spoke up. She asked, "Does any body speak Spanish?" Apparently a tourist on the train needed some translation help.

Now, this was a nice thing for that woman to do to begin with, after having assessed the situation, taking the next step to do something more about it when she obviously was no help linguistically. And it could have gone one of three ways. Maybe someone on the train did speak Spanish, but because of our often aloof and self-centered city mentality, she ducked her head down and continued to peruse the latest issue of Glamour. Maybe someone spoke Spanish and actually took the time to step up to the plate and help out. Or maybe no one spoke Spanish, although I would find that rather shocking.

Luckily for the Spanish tourist, someone did speak Spanish and did step up to el plato. A nice young man dressed in biz-cas attire with a laptop bag slung over his arm said, "I do," and I think even raised his hand like in school. He walked over and helped the tourist suss out the situation, which probably had to do with stations and directions.

Kindness not lost translation.
La amabilidad es universal.

Kindness: A handfull of flowers

On the way to work one morning, Co-worker stopped to smell the flowers. Literally.

There used to be some amazing lilac trees in her neighborhood, at a large manor surrounded by smaller, multi-family homes. But then, the patriarch or matriarch of the family died and the house was passed down to the younger generations. And the younger generations decided they didn't want to deal with it, so they sold the place. And the new owners chopped down all the lilac trees.

So when she came upon a yard with lilacs in full bloom, she stopped to smell the flowers. The lilacs' fragrance filling the air. After pausing for a few moments, she carried on her way.

She was half-way down the block when she heard someone shouting "ma'am" behind her. She kept walking for a while before realizing that the man running up behind her was actually trying to catch her. In his hand, he had lilac clippings for her. He said that he saw her admiring the flowers in his yard and wanted her to have some. She, rightfully, was shocked at the act of kindness.

And so was a woman walking her dog nearby. She said that was the nicest thing she's ever seen.
Women always love flowers. But from a complete stranger, through a random act. Amazing.

Kindness: Clean up

The other morning, on the way to work, I saw something that warmed my heart.

It was a sunny morning that was pretty warm, so I decided to walk to catch the bus into town. Its not too long a walk down a nice street with plenty of trees and fun houses to look at. Sometimes I'm one of a very few people walking, and sometimes I am one of many. It was a one of many morning.

The man in front of me, probably in his late 40s or early 50s, was moving along at a good clip. I noticed him stop and pick up something off the ground. I though, maybe he dropped something. But it happened again and again. About 3 or 4 times in all. And I realized he wasn't picking up something he dropped, but something someone else had dropped. Or discarded. Or tried to recycle. He was picking up litter.

When I walk around the city and my neighborhood, I can't help but notice all the trash that's around. It's not that Boston or Cambridge or Somerville are really dirty cities, it's just that they are cities. Period. And trash gets spilled. Recycled papers blow away in the wind before they can be collected on trash day. And people loose things. And people litter, but probably not much more than anywhere else. It's just that you see it when you walk instead of whizzing by in your car and not noticing.

When I walk and notice trash, I usually don't do too much about it. Sometimes if I see a trashcan that blew over I'll right it as long as there's not horrible mess. Sometimes if a box has blown into the street I'll grab it and put it back in its recycling bin so a car doesn't have to swerve to avoid it. And sometimes I'll pick up a plastic bottle if I see an recycling bin or trash can nearby. But I don't spend part of my morning commute actively picking up litter as I go. But this guy did. Which is great. And makes me think that maybe I should do that sometimes too. Just a little that can make a big difference. Or at least a small one in our neighborhood.